Dancing on a tree spine

I will one of these days be more proactive in providing pictures with some of these posts. Especially the tree I danced with this weekend....

I went to Tilden Regional Park north of UC Berkeley with my friend/mentor/teacher/collaborator for a short hike and a butoh practice/play. On our way back, we stopped at a tree that resembled a spine with the ribs jetting out the sides. We decided to pick this area for practice. Without any plan in mind, we began climbing the tree, which was at a slant, so if you fell you didn't have a long way to go down.

We laid on it; sat; leaned; walked from branch to branch; perched on a branch like crows taking a break; and, of course, danced. There's something calming, spiritual, and grounding when in nature, especially when you take the time to really BE in a spot.

Even though the bark on the tree trunk was dry and falling off, there were living pine needles at the edge of the some of branches, so we both knew it was still alive. Gazing up toward the sky, the other pines around us provided a blanket or net of protection. The wind traveled all around and through us and the tree, adding more of the natural atomsphere.

I wonder if that tree was dancing too. I hope we made it happy because I felt better afterward, even though I felt fine before.

Perhaps it's the connection with nature. With butoh practice, I find the exercises very primitive or related to nature. You learn to embody them as a whole, through a break down of body parts and senses. For example, I loved making my arm, hand and fingers mirror the tree branches. Then, I would allow the rest of my body to join in. Also, the sounds of nature. For instance, gawking like a crow or some other bird. Although, it may seem absurd at first (and we were laughing quite a bit at first), it's quite playful and animalistic.

Aaaahhh, nature! Give me some MORE of that!

I think we all could use a little more.

Do you dance in nature? If so, where?

My Relationship with Butoh

What is my relationship with Butoh?

I asked myself this question after attending, Between Experiment, Form and Culturalism: Butoh in History and Contemporary Practice at UCLA on May 20-22. I drove down with two other women, who also practice and dance Butoh. I received so much information, it was almost too much! But I got to see some amazing Butoh Dancers perform and connect with other like-minded Butoh enthusiasts.

So what is my relationship to Butoh? I don't know where to start, so let's ask another question, what is Butoh to me? Here's a list:

• mysterious
• transformation
• different from other dance forms such as ballet, modern, etc.
• cathartic
• emotional
• physical
• dark
• beautiful
• violent
• sensual
• moving meditation
• chaotic
• disorganized
• surreal
• healthy
  

This is only the short version of the list.

I love it because it's everything for me when I witness, perform and practice it. I can't stand it sometimes because I can never explain it in words to someone, who has never heard of it. I usually say, "Go on youtube and search 'butoh'." I guess that's why I keep doing it. It's a continuous, ongoing practice, which changes each time you experience it. Something new emerges and more becomes clear or confusing. There's no set form because everyone carries it differently.

For example, Maro Akaji, who was one of the panelists and workshop facilitators at the UCLA Butoh Symposium, explained how we have "molds" or histories within us. These "mold" come from our past, ancestors, traumas, etc. We bring these molds to our Butoh practice. This is why I find it so intriguing and rich.

Although, I could probably write an entire essay on my relationship with Butoh, I feel, right now, it's complicated. But open. I'm open and willing to see what it presents itself to me, and not pushed or pressured into finding its meaning. Only a sense of allowing and appreciation for its mystery and beauty at this time.

For those of you who have practiced, performed and/or witnessed Butoh, what's your relationship with it? What keeps you interested and/or coming back? Love? Hate? Meaning?

Moving in outdoor spaces 2

Over the weekend I got to experience moving on the beach in a variety of different ways and forms. I hope to add some photos and video from this day to this blog soon. Above is just one of the many images captured.

Playing with elements was so exhilarating! The wind, ocean, and sand inspired me immensely. Also, some man-made elements too: cement walls covered with graffiti.

On the beach, surrounded by sand, water, concrete, mountains, people, and animals, I danced for my Nana. It's the 1 year anniversary of her passing, so I felt the need to acknowledge and honor that. As the wind pushed and penetrated me, I embodied my Nana's qualities as I remembered. I allowed my body to move with those memories and experiences of her as a person, woman, and spirit. I really love the concept of embodiment with movement, especially with butoh. What are some ways one unites the mind and body in the performance arts? I would love to read more about this. Those who are reading this, if you have any recommendations, do share!

After my dance "For Nana", my dance partner and I began to embody the dogs in the area. I'm not sure where to begin in describing this, so I'll just go for it. We began mirroring a dog nearby, that was hysterically digging into the sand and jumping around, probably to get his owners' attention (they were laying on a blanket). So we began digging in the sand like wild animals. The energy and work involved in this was so much, my dance partner said, "it's tiring to be a dog." Then we began playing "stick." Literally, throwing the stick out to a point and the other going after it; however, in our case, we were leaping for it. There was a lot of belly laughing in between leaps during this time, which went on for 15 minutes. When do you decide and say to your friend/companion, "Let's play stick." What a concept. In fact, what a great time! Everyone should do this.

Our final spot, was the concrete wall of graffiti, which had a steep hill of sand directly in front it, creating a dip formation. We played with this construction by jumping and hopping from sand to wall. The wall had a slight curve to it, so you felt like a skateboarder, only without the skateboard. Running, jumping, hopping, turning, pausing, and embodying. Embodying the energy from the concrete and graffiti. One could inquire what the purpose was for a particular piece of the graffiti; when it was created there; etc. I love how the sand intersected with it, bringing this natural element into the play.

Moving in the outdoors gives so much possibility and inspiration, I want more......

Just physical

This is my intention I want to create this Saturday for my movement practice. I want my movement to just be physical, and then see where it transforms. Tracking my thoughts and imagination will be very interesting.

I tend to put meaning into my movement all the time. In other words, there's some chatter that says, "your movement HAS to have meaning" and "if it doesn't have meaning, it's boring." I just blogged about this in detail on my other blog HERE if you're interested.

Although my intuition and heart says that isn't true, it's just my ego again looking to sabotage. You're so clever, ego!

Anyway, I'm interested in the movement itself and how my body/mind/spirit reacts to it. I do want to teach movement more, but at this point, I just want to move. Experience the physical. Watch, observe, and witness the body as this movable, expressive vehicle, and not get stuck in the head about what it means! Sometimes ya need a break from that.

Why do we tend to put meaning into everything, especially movement? Can we just appreciate it for what it presents?

Unleashing energy

My butoh/movement practice was truly engaging this past weekend. A lot of great exercises that warmed up and released some energy that was stored up in my body. Although, I had an energy session prior to practice, it was no accident I did some of these exercises.

One of them was about resistance. You pick a point across the room, and another person creates resistance with your body as you try to walk towards it. My partner grasped my ankles, while I moved toward the point using my core. I felt a struggle and my edge. I allowed myself to safely fall forward when I lost balance, but I kept pressing on. All of a sudden, guttural sound escaped me and I was grunting, yelling, roaring and screaming. It was like a fire was set within and I was unleashing it in any possible way I could. Afterward, my whole abdomen (power center) was humming. There was so much energy going through me I felt dizzy and almost nauseous. I got some air, sat down, and drank some water. As I took some deep breaths, I released some more emotion and I felt this very calm, sense of relief. I have been doing a lot of work on re-tuning my sense of power, will and intuition (also chakra 3). It's wonderful to be able to feel and acknowledge it!

The rest of the exercises were grounding and less intense ;-) I realized that I put a lot of meaning into the movement I do, and sometimes, it's okay to be "just physical" with movement. One of the exercises was playing with gravity; allowing yourself to fall and roll on the floor. Very playful! The other one was moving along your axis. You stand in a spot in a space and close your eyes, visualizing your body's axis. With a soft gaze, you move in a circle along your axis, while taking in the world around you. A big difference than looking out, but rather receiving what comes into your field of vision. There are more things you can add to it, which can make it engaging in different ways. One can make contact with another or not. It depends on the intention of the exercise.

What does energy mean to you? How do you unleash your energy when you feel you can't contain it anymore? What are some ways you contain it? i.e. stimulate acupressure points, sing, chant, dance, etc.

I feel we all have a fire within us.

Teaching movement

I had the opportunity to guide a movement exercise over the weekend. It was nice to be the guide/teacher/witness for a change. I'm always the one following and moving from what someone else is saying. I really got to hone in on my teaching chops and this inspired me more and MORE! Although being a yoga teacher helped, I know my strengths are voice projection, being present, and holding the space and group involved. I got feedback from my group of movers, but I want more constructive feedback. What worked and didn't work.

I'm totally down with going for it. Ya have to start somewhere, right? There are going to be things that don't work, but how do you know, unless you try?

For all movement teachers, what obstacles did you run into in the beginning? What are your strengths as a teacher? What works well? Did you ever have a bad experience?

I would really LOVE to hear your experiences. If you want to respond privately, feel free to email me, lizsfilippone@gmail.com. Thank you for sharing!

Intentions for movement practice

• Continue meetings every 2 weeks with group
• Free-write once a week about ideas, inspirations, thoughts, emotions, etc.
  
• Obtain small notebook to carry around with me everywhere to jot down ideas and inspirations
• Practice butoh/movement exercise once a week for 15 minutes
• Complete group intention questions by the end of April

I think these are doable for me at this point. I tend to overload my schedule; however I've been doing a brilliant job of keeping it quite open for myself. As movement and creating performance work is important to my well-being, creating and writing down intentions is very grounding. It brings you home and reminds you of your purpose. For instance, why you do what you do; what do you love about it; how it feeds you mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Do you have a movement practice? If so, why do you do it? What are your intentions for that practice? How does movement feed your whole being?